“Your Business Partners Clearly Have Problems of Their Own”
It could be…
“The Person You Have an Interpersonal Relationship With”
“Have Problems of Their Own.”
This is the last thing you need to hear, when any
relationship(s) are unhealthy/toxic…
Often this will be the case, but how does this help you?
In my experience, it meant I needed to change
NOTHING!
That was the responsibility of my business partners,
romantic partners, and family.
I’d stick to my guns, fighting it out, controlling, forcing
HUSTLING and GRINDING – Stressed, Anxious
Frustrated (PISSED OFF) Insecure about losing a life
I wasn’t truly enjoying, and unable to sleep…
A highly toxic working environment, accompanied by
many unhealthy, collapsing relationships with others
vibrating on a similar low level of energy was causing carnage.
This pattern had been spiralling for years… it hadn’t felt
safe (BODY) to change anything…
CHAOS was familiar and predictable.
When you are living under the hormones of stress,
in sympathetic dominance (Fight/Flight/Freeze/Fawn)
The unknown – the Present Moment isn’t safe for your system.
How was I to know I was stuck in overdrive,
unable to switch to the parasympathetic branch of the autonomic nervous system (automatic)
I’d normalised the state I was living in, years ago
I’d learned very young how to adapt – regulate,
change my state of consciousness using
sport, music, travelling, money, consumption, intensity, and alcohol.
This is what we’re able to do.
High Achievers often have access to such external resources
but have never learned, been taught how to use the
resources you were born with to live in regulation.
Dysregulation is a system that isn’t able to return to balance.
Balance doesn’t mean passive, it means homeostasis, adaptability and flexibility in any given circumstances,
responsive, not reactive, and if you do react, it doesn’t last hours or days.
In 2014, after thinking about it as I was lying in a hospital bed unable to walk,
I concluded that the only way I could have the life I’d always wanted was
by creating a new identity that fitted the requirements.
This time, taking sovereignty, because at 30, I wanted the professional to produce the answers.
He didn’t; he confirmed what I believed, without challenging me or asking how I believed I could move forward.
I’ve learned a great deal about how to help high achievers create the change they wish to see in their lives since I started reflecting and working with other coaches, whom I employed to help me create a higher level of visibility
Most had a”Method”, a “Blueprint” that they wanted me to adhere to rigidly, some suggesting I embellish my life story, others telling me to stop saying certain things because my ideal clients weren’t saying the same things.
I’m confident you understand what I mean when I say -The relationship you have with yourself is paramount.
I also almost died at 40. I can tell you about the generational, prenatal, and preverbal traumas I had.
The adverse childhood experiences, negative life experiences, near-death experiences, and traumas I had.
I didn’t agree with what they were saying, and instead of the support I needed,
felt like they were attempting to make me fit the blueprint, not accommodate my unique requirements.
This is why I insist it is you who must be at the wheel – sovereign – with a co-driver who knows the terrain.
It’s my job to co-create with you, in a team, to support you using the vast amount of knowledge I’ve gained in life.
This is the most efficient and effective way for you to get the results you want and need, as quickly as possible.
To find balance, calmness, connection, aliveness, peace, purpose,
success, fulfilment – health and wellbeing, without losing your edge.
Becoming a passive participant in the creation of my new self and life was out of the question.
Refreshments with the guys on a cycling trip from Santander to Lisbon, September 2022
I might not drink alcohol any longer, while others do, but there are no limitations in my life.
The thought of losing my edge was ridiculous.
We are high achievers, and losing our edge isn’t an option.
You can live a life free from any restrictions.
What would you do differently if chaos were no longer familiar?
The Conscious Edge I Insight